Nuns....yay!

	Nuns....yay!

	If you were a nun, would you sneak out of that convent at night to go and sex yourself up with the local Methodist minister? Would you tell him that you were a nun? Would your name be Sister Anthony? ~ Frequently pondered question asked by Phil.

NUN JOKES:

~The Mother Superior instructs two nuns to paint a new room in the convent. "And don't get a drop of paint on your habits," she sternly admonishes. The two nuns decide that the only way they will keep their habits clean is to take them off, paint the room, then put them back on. So they strip, and begin painting. Suddenly there is a knock at the door."Who is it?" asks one of the nuns. "Blind man," comes the reply. The nuns look at each other and shrug. "No harm letting him in," one says, and opens the door. "Whoa, sister! Where do you want these blinds?"

~This german tourist was on a bus tour of Castilla during the summer that had a stop at this old convent. The tour wasn't that interesting and he managed to stay behind and start wandering. Feeling the urge, he stopped to pee on the outside wall of the chapel. While he was doing his business, he was surprised by the Mother Superior. "OH! I am soo sorry!' "No," she replied. "Actually, I've never seen a man's...You know. Could I take a look?" The tourist was freaked out by a nun asking to see his works but it was kinda kinky in a way, so he
figured, what the hell. The nun looked at it for a bit and as he was about to put it away she said, "You know, I always wanted to touch it. Would you mind...?" "This is really wierd, but sure." The tourist was getting really exited. Who could say that you had been tossed off by a nun? "Could you take it all out so that I can get a complete expience?" the nun requested. The tourist, sure that he was about to get laid, willingly took down his pants. The nun began fondleing his testicles and sudennly straightened, and said,
"Don't (SQUEEZE) piss (SQUEEZE) on the (SQUEEZE) church (SQUEEZE) walls!!!!!!!!!!!(SQUEEZE).

The principal at my school is a nun, so I am dedicating this page to SISTA TONY!!!

~Four nuns were standing in line at the gates of heaven. Peter asks the first if she has ever sinned. "Well, once I looked at a man's penis," she said. "Put some of this holy water on your eyes and you may enter heaven," Peter told her. Peter then asked the second nun if she had ever sinned. "Well, once I held a man's penis," she replied. "Put your hand in this holy water and you may enter heaven," he said. Just then the fourth nun pushed ahead of the third nun. Peter asked her, "Why did you push ahead in line?" She said, "Because I want to gargle before she sits in it!"

~Two Scottish nuns have just arrived in USA by boat and one says to the other, "I hear that the people of this country actually eat dogs." "Odd," her companion replies, "but if we shall live in America, we might as well do as the Americans do." Nodding emphatically, the mother superior points to a hot dog vendor and they both walk towards the cart. "Two dogs, please," says one. The vendor is only too pleased to oblige, wraps both hot dogs in foil and hands them over the counter. Excited, the nuns hurry to a bench and begin to unwrap their dogs. The mother superior is first to open hers. She begins to blush and, then, staring at it for a moment, leans to the other nun and whispers cautiously, "What part did you get?"